


Angel's Lament

by ZAMBOT_3



Category: The Big O
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2017-06-27
Packaged: 2018-11-19 16:19:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11317107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZAMBOT_3/pseuds/ZAMBOT_3
Summary: Angel feels more than a little disappointed that Roger did not reciprocate.





	Angel's Lament

Artificiality didn’t mean much in Paradigm, in the same way that the truth didn’t mean much when a core piece of your life or memories was missing then what was real or fake just didn’t matter much anymore as long as it meant security. Yes, security, in the end, that primal desire for safety must’ve been the cause. Roger did not shy from her because her feelings were not shared, but because she represented an unknown while the Android was a much better security blanket. Angel hated to feel so bitter, but the mere idea filled her with a faint disgust. An Android wasn’t much of a person, and yet Roger found it better company than her? Angel did not want not want to believe the possibility that Roger was a much more base person who preferred the Android as an unable to refuse toy, leaving her with the impression that he was either lowly enough to refuse true human contact for a fancy doll or that she was truly repugnant enough that the negotiator had no interest in her.

 

Angel’s mirror was somewhat obscured at the bottom by the products aligning her sink, but she could still see herself plainly, and moreover, her scars were made all the more visible by her exposing choice of dress. Was her appearance not titillating enough? Though her damnable scars turned her own stomach Roger had not so much as averted his eyes at first inspection, and she was under the impression that Roger was a man who preferred blondes. Angel halted her line of thought at that. How had she come to that conclusion?

 

Surely that was just Roger’s type as simple as that, but something had told her that Roger would never refuse her, that her role was that of his natural counterpart and companion. There’s that word again: ‘role’. Angel had been thinking in terms of ‘roles’ for some time now, it was a childish and simplistic way of looking at things, but effective at times. After all, Roger’s role was as a negotiator, but more so he was something of a hero, indomitable and full of wit. Alex Rosewater’s role was as mayor, but more so something of a natural foil to the negotiator even wearing white in contrast to Roger’s black. But, what was her role? Thinking in terms of heroes and villains would make her a femme fatale, she was playing both sides to a degree, and she and Roger held a certain chemistry certainly.

 

By their roles, they fit well together, and beyond that, she had been there in his presence, felt the charge of every action and word shared by the two, if they did not belong together then why should he and that porcelain doll of a maid work any better? The idea of these roles being shafted struck Angel the wrong way and she cursed the Android, Dorothy, for having skewed everything so terribly. Suddenly everything felt very murky to Angel, the woman in the mirror didn’t quite look like her, she looked like a true femme fatale, a man killer whose skill was unquestioned and wore silk hiding steel, a woman who would be a step ahead of the hero and exchanged barbed words with them, but would always be drawn to each other before finally becoming close and…

 

Angel stopped that line of thought, things in the real worlds were too complicated to be ruled in such childish ways. Then again, many of the things within Paradigm City were fantastical, even perhaps childish in an imaginative sort of way. Angel afforded one last glance at the mirror before turning away from it. The woman in the mirror didn’t look much like her at all, Angel decided. In the mirror was a woman who knew her role and played it well, Angel didn’t know her role at all, and doubted she was very entertaining in it.


End file.
